Momentum
by Dai-Chan
Summary: (WIP. Third chapter up. You need to read Vargas by Zarla in order to understand this. Rating's gone up. Deal. SLASH. Don't likie, don't readie.) Edgar's sanity is running thin. He's gonna prove his point and he's gonna prove it NOW, gosh darnit! Even if i
1. One

Author's Notes: This seriously deranged fic was inspired by two completely different songs: "Live and Learn" by Alannis Morissete and "Yellowstone" by Rhexx. Also inspired by Zarla's JtHM fanfic "Vargas." Yer gonna need to read that in order to get this fic. Sorry. I have no idea where this is set in the Vargas timeline. Seriously. NO. FREAKIN'. CLUE. Right. Bye.

Disclaimer: I don't own Edgar or Johnny. Jhonen "Ill-Prone Belly" Vasquez owns them. Scriabin, no matter how much he doesn't like it, is owned by Zarla.

Momentum

by Dai

Awkward silence. Sunlight drifting through the kitchen window, bathing them in an unwanted orange glow.

Both of them stared. Not at anything in particular. . .Just anywhere but at the other.

"So. . ."

"Mm'hm."

". . .Yeah."

Edgar scratched the back of his head as Nny stared at the table's glass surface.

Mornings had followed in the same way since Nny, without really asking, had moved in with him.

"Did you, uhm. . .Did you want something to eat?"

_Fantastic, Edgar. You've officially adopted your own little murderer. How benevolent. Shelter him, feed him, clothe him. . ._

_I haven't given him any clothes. . . _

_That's not the point!_

"I'm not hungry." Nny continued to watch the kitchen table, face destitute of any emotion.

"Oh. Right. Well, uh. . .I'm going to take a shower, so. . .You can, you know, watch TV or read."

_Or go search for innocent victims._

_Shut up!_

"All right."

Edgar stood up, hesitant to leave Nny by himself. "Uhm. . ." _Don't say it! _"Are you sure you're not hungry?" _You idiot._

There was a sharp clatter as Johnny stood up, knocking the chair over and grabbing Edgar by the front of his shirt.

"I said I'm not hungry so quit being so #&ing nice to me!"

Edgar was startled by his words. "I just. . .You're my guest and I, er, want to make sure you're comfortable. . ."

_Liar._

Nny glared at him a moment before dropping him. "You're lying."

_You're a horrible liar, my dear._

_Shut up._

"What makes you think that?"

_I'm stunned. No 'er's or 'uhm's or stuttering!_

"I'm not a guest. You didn't invite me."

Edgar returned to his chair. "But I didn't kick you out. I let you stay."

Johnny watched him carefully as he picked up the fallen chair and sat back down. "That's not the same as inviting me."

"How?"

_You're arguing with a psycho killer!_

Confusion spread across Nny's formerly emotionless face. "What?"

Edgar put his elbows on the table, leaning forward slightly. "How is it different?"

Nny frowned. "If you had invited me, then you would want me here."

"But if I didn't want you here, then I wouldn't let you stay."

_Are you saying you want him here?_

That look of perplexity returned and Johnny had to run what was said over in his mind before he could respond. "Are you implying that you _do_ want me here?"

Edgar abruptly stood up. "I'm going to take a shower now."

"Don't you walk away! Answer me, god dammit!"

Edgar halted on his way to the bathroom. "Maybe I do."

There was a few moments of silence before he turned around to see Nny trembling where he stood. "Nny? What. . .?"

"Stop it."

Edgar slowly walked towards him. "Stop. . .what?"

"Stop it!" Johnny slumped forwards onto his knees, shoulders shaking. "Just. . .stop. Don't. . .being nice. . .like. . .I don't. . .don't want. . .love."

Edgar's eyes widened. "What?"

_He said 'love'._

_I know what he said, dammit!_

He slid down into a kneeling position in front of Nny. Tentatively, he reached his hand out and placed it on one of Johnny's trembling shoulders. "Nny?"

"Don't. . .love. . .stop. . ." Johnny grabbed Edgar's shoulders and leaned forward to hide his face in his shirt. "Want. . . dead. Want you dead."

Edgar cautiously put his arms around the thin, shivering form. "I'd. . . I'd rather not die, but. . ."

"Why do you like me? Why are you so nice to me?"

_Good question._

"I. . .I'm not really sure. But I. . .I think. . ." Edgar tried to put it in words that Nny would understand better and that would mean more to him. "I think I 'want you dead,' too."

_You're a freak, Edgar._

Johnny stopped shaking and looked up at Edgar. "You mean you. . .You love. . .?" He trailed off, leaving the question hanging.

Edgar coughed softly. "Yeah."

_Aw. How sweet._

_Shut up._

"Why?" Nny leaned back on his knees, knuckles white from the tight grip on the sleeves of Edgar's shirt.

He shrugged. "I honestly don't know. I just know that I do."

"I'll probably end up killing you."

Edgar smiled gently. "I know."

Confusion again. "But you still. . .You still love me?"

"It's a strange emotion like that."

"Prove it."

Edgar's eyes widened in surprise. "What?"

"Prove that you love me and that you're not just lying again."

"How. . ." Edgar began to ask, then realized he didn't really need to. He gave a nervous cough. "I'm not sure I can do that."

"Then you don't."

Irritation suddenly flooded through him. "Yes. I do."

"No, you don't!"

_God, you two fight like children._

_He started it!_

_I rest my case._

Edgar fought to keep calm, but lost it as Nny continued to glare at him and mouth "You don't."

"Fine! I'll prove it!" He grabbed the front of Johnny's shirt and jerked him forward, covering Nny's lips with his own.

There was a moment's struggle before Johnny's grip tightened on his shoulders and Edgar felt himself pulled forward as well.

Mouths opened and tongues fought for dominance.

There was a muffled thump as Johnny's back hit the carpet. He growled and fought to get up, but Edgar was healthier and stronger and pinned him down by his arms.

_I won't let him win!_

_You're nuts, Edgar. He'll kill you. _

_I did what he said. I'm proving it._

_He's still going to kill you._

_He was going to kill me anyway!_

_. . .Good point._

Without breaking the rather aggressive kiss, Edgar put his arm behind Johnny's back and pulled him up, shuffling sideways down the hall with him.

There were a few grunts as they stumbled over each other's feet, then a loud crash followed by a string of curses as they fell into Edgar's bedroom door.

_This is more amusing than reality TV._

_God, will you shut up?!_

After several four-letter words from Nny, Edgar dragged him over to his neatly made bed and kissed him again, this time more gently.

He carefully pulled him forward to sit on his lap, where Johnny immeadiately went limp.


	2. Two

Edgar slid his fingers through blue strands before leaning back to watch Nny, who was staring blankly at him. "Please don't do this. You wanted me to prove it and that's what I plan to do."

Johnny looked up slowly. He opened his mouth to speak, faltered, and closed it again.

"You do still want me to prove it, don't you?"

Nny sat still for a moment, then, without warning, leaned up and kissed Edgar.

_Guess that's a yes._

He grinned into the kiss before slipping his tongue between the barrier of lips. He felt a bony finger trace one of the scars beneath his eyes and slowly leaned backward onto his bed, pulling Johnny on top of him.

_You're a naughty boy, Edgar._

_Okay, this is the part where I ignore you._

_What? You don't want advice?_

_Not from _you

_That hurts._

He took his hands from Nny's hair and slid them down his back, fingers briefly skimming the bumps of Johnny's spine along the way.

_He really needs to eat more._

Silence.

_Aren't you going to say something?_

More silence. Edgar mentally shrugged it off, then broke the kiss. As they both gasped for air, Edgar took the hem of Johnny's shirt and pulled it off. Nny made an unusual guttural sound as his shirt was tossed aside.

Edgar hushed him gently and wrenched his own shirt off before dropping it off the side of the bed where it joined Johnny's on the white carpeted floor.

"You sure this is what you want?"

Nny growled. "Quit asking me that before I change my mind."

Dude to the man's mental state, Edgar was fairly sure he'd change his mind whether he continued asking him or not.

_Forget Johnny's mental state. Maybe you should be thinking of your _own _sanity at this point._

_There you are._

Johnny snatched Edgar's glasses off his face and hurriedly placed them on the nightstand.

"Wh--?" Before Edgar could form the one word, Nny had rolled them over so Edgar was on top and yanked his head down for another kiss.


	3. Three

_You do know what you're getting into, right?_

_Yes._

_And you're _sure_ you really want to do this?_

_YES._

As Nny was doing most of the kissing, Edgar concentrated on getting his pants off without breaking the kiss.

His attempts proved ineffectual, however, as the hem of his pajama pants caught on the tip of his erection.

He groaned in embarassment and Johnny broke the kiss, confused. "What?"

_Poor Edgar. Do you think this is a sign from God?_

_NO. I _DON'T_. Now just _shut_ the f_#$k _up!_

_Oh. You're angry._

Nny looked down and took Edgar's member in his hand, using the other to pull the pants the rest of the way down.

_...f#&k._

_I thought you wanted this...?_

_I'm not so sure now..._

_God, Edgar, make up your damn mind._

_Well, it's sort of a big decision to make!_

Edgar gasped and grabbed Johnny's wrist, trying to pull his hand away. "St...stop!"

Nny frowned and yanked his arm back. "Why?"

"I can't do this."

Johnny growled. "Why the f#&k not?!"

Edgar scrambled up and pulled his pants back on. "It's too fast!"

Nny took his wrists and jerked him forward. "You f#&king lied to me!"

Edgar tried to pull away, but the other man's grip tightened. "I wasn't lying, Nny." He fought to keep calm under Johnny's death glare. "I do love you. I just don't think we're ready for this yet."

"And who the f#&k are _you_ to decide if _we're_ ready or not?!"

"It's a two person decision, Nny! If _I_ don't think we're ready than we're _not_ going to do it!"

Johnny growled again and put a hand around Edgar's throat. "I'll f#&king _kill_ you!"

Edgar coughed. "No. You won't."

Johnny's eyes widened. "What did you say?" His grip loosened.

"I said you won't. You won't kill me because things aren't perfect, Nny. I know you now. There's no way you'd kill me at this point. You want things to be perfect."


End file.
